– Learning Why Anxiety is So Exhausting Through Nashville Individual Counseling

Last Updated on May 9, 2016 by Chris Roberts

WHY IS ANXIETY SO OVERWHELMING AND WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?

Anxiety just doesn’t stop. It is so exhausting and overwhelming….at least when we are in the throws of anxiety. Part of the difficulty is even knowing when we are working out of an anxious brain versus when we might just be scared or tired. When we are working out of the anxious part of our brain, it seems like there is nothing we can do to make the anxiety go away. Not only do we feel helpless to make it go away, sometimes it feels like it might never leave us alone.

WHY DOES ANXIETY GET US SO WORKED UP?

When we are in an anxious state, our brain is working at hyper speed to understand the “threat” and to find the quickest way possible to make the “threat” go away. We usually can find quick ways to reduce its impact or lessen its effect. However, oftentimes the quickest way to reduce our anxiety isn’t the best way for effectively dealing with it. If we find ourselves scared to fall asleep in our house alone at night, we might close all the blinds, lock and block all entryway doors, clutch our cell phone in our hands, and listen for any sign of threat. All of these external means of calming our anxiety may work to reduce some of our worry, but because we are taking action in the outside world, we are still behaving in a way AS IF the anxiety is real.

If we begin to worry that our partner is cheating on us, we may start texting them relentlessly, or turn on our “find my cell phone” app to locate our partner, or badger them to no end once they return home. Although any of these external methods may help us feel better in the moment, again, they do not address the reality that we may be working from an anxious brain state.

LEARNING THROUGH NASHVILLE INDVIDUAL COUNSELING THAT ANXIETY WILL ALWAYS WIN

One of the most important distinctions we work through in individual counseling is learning that we can’t argue with anxiety and we can’t use external forces to help us calm down. Well, we CAN argue and use external forces, but they won’t help us (or our partners) in the long run!

Anxiety will always win an argument, because anxiety will never settle until it receives a guarantee. And when we are in a calm brain state, we know there are no guarantees in this life. Anxiety says, “Prove to me that no one will break into our house tonight.” As we work to “prove” that no one will break in, we stir the hornets next of anxiety into a greater and greater frenzy. Anxiety says, “Prove to me that our partner isn’t cheating on us.” Again, the onus is on us to provide 100% proof that our worry isn’t valid. The problem with this thinking is that our worry IS VALID. There is ALWAYS a reason to worry! It’s just that usually, we know we can’t worry about every little thing, because that would be exhausting.

CAN NASHVILLE INDIVIDUAL COUNSELING HELP?

Nashville individual counseling can help with anxiety to the extent that a person is willing to do the hard work of recognizing when they are in an anxious state and when they are willing to resist the urge to argue with anxiety or set up external forces to calm down.

This becomes the difficult work of individual counseling. We have to be willing to trust that the anxiety will pass. We have to work to put the anxiety out of our minds for the hope that it will leave us.

If you are struggling with anxiety in any area of your life, Nashville individual counseling can be a great resource for you. Chris Roberts at Two Trees Counseling Nashville would love the opportunity to work with you.