– What is Anger Management Counseling for Individuals in Nashville TN?

Last Updated on January 26, 2015 by Chris Roberts

WHAT IS ANGER MANAGEMENT COUNSELING FOR INDIVIDUALS IN NASHVILLE TN?

Anger management counseling in Nashville TN has such negative connotations. It is completely understandable why this is so. Most clients who enter counseling for anger usually come against their will. Sometimes it is under obligations from the justice system, but often it is a last threat from a spouse or loved one. To even admit that one has anger issues bears all the negative weight of social implications that they are out of control and cause violence all around them. Of course, of course, this is sometimes true. But all too often, this is not the case. From a fundamental basis, it is good to have some anger in our life, or at least be aware of our natural tendency to react in anger or extreme frustration. When that reaction becomes the norm, or we don’t see any other options for reacting during those situations, then people may need a little help in both understanding their anger and finding alternative methods for engaging conflict during those times.

In our initial session for anger management counseling in Nashville TN, I want to assess why they are attending: voluntarily or from extreme persuasion (or obligation). If a person attends anger management counseling voluntarily, then it clues me in to their own awareness of their anger and exhibits some level of desire to change. If a person comes to anger management counseling due to pressure from an external source, then I will constantly keep in mind they may not see a real problem, or they may not truly be invested in the work. Neither scenario is better than the other, it just helps inform me of how best to proceed.

If a person enters anger management counseling in Nashville TN due to pressure from an outside source, my number one priority is giving them specific and tangible resources for calming their anger in moments of conflict. This can look like taking a time out, or going to a different room in the house and counting to 100, or just learning to say, “I am angry. And when I am angry, I say things I don’t really mean. I need some time to chill.” For an angry person who consistently reacts in anger and can’t find any helpful strategies for dealing with their anger, just being able to admit, “I’m angry. And when I’m angry, I’m irrational,” can be so profoundly helpful, because it alerts their loved ones to the reality of the situation. Typically, when we admit to being angry, it takes away some of the power of our anger.

If a person attends anger management counseling in Nashville TN on their own accord, then I will take more time to understand where and when the anger began in their life. Depending on how self-aware a person is during the exploration, I can assess if self-exploration will be helpful in calming areas of high-intensity and anger. Sometimes, people are angry because they feel stuck and hopeless. They haven’t yet put the words to how stuck and hopeless they feel, and when they are able to discover this aspect of their lives, the anger can be contained within other emotions like sadness or disappointment.

Oftentimes, anger is a mask to guard against more painful feelings like sadness, loss, or disappointment. Anger presents itself as strong and powerful. It’s the perfect antidote to feeling lost, helpless, sad, or powerless. Without the awareness that anger could be hiding sadness or hopelessness, we continue in our anger because it seems to be the only thing that keeps us above water. Many of us are scared to admit to the pain we have experienced in our lives, and so we create a system of pseudo-power and control through anger and frustration. Life is inherently frustrating and disappointing. In each and every day, there are things we hope to happen and count on happening that don’t come to fruition. We can either shut down in the face of so much disappointment, or react against it through anger and pretend we have much more control over life than we actually do.

Anger management counseling in Nashville TN is not easy or simple. We first have to admit we over-react with anger more often than not, then we must be willing to do the hard work of changing our reactions. Changing our reactions and our patterns is one of the most difficult things to do in all of life.

There are many qualified therapists in Nashville TN that can be of help, if you notice anger is affecting your life in negative ways. Chris Roberts at Two Trees Counseling Nashville has experience working with individuals struggling with how to manage their anger and would love the opportunity to talk with you more about your situation.